May 2, 2014

Daddy's Home

Alternate Title: The Day Mama Became Chopped Liver.

In early January when Mary was only 20 days old, Miles moved to Savannah, Georgia where he signed in to a new unit and got his fifth free airline ticket to Afghanistan. His unit was already deployed, but thanks to Mary's timing, he was able to remain in Texas for her birth and deploy a little later. Because he was set to deploy as soon as he arrived in Georgia, we decided it made the most sense for me to stay near our family and friends who live in Texas. I'm so glad we did that too - because while it was a fairly short deployment, it was so nice to live near so many supportive and helpful friends. It was nice for Finn to have the people he knew nearby (especially his cousins who are his best buddies) and to stick to his usual routine in the midst of a new baby arriving and his daddy leaving.

About a month ago Miles returned home from his deployment. Mary and I flew out to Georgia to welcome him back and to house hunt while Finn remained in Texas with my mom (who was on her spring break) and later his Aunt Jenny who looked after him until I returned.

I'm not going to lie - it was nice to get away for a little bit and for me to miss Finn for a few days. Mary and I got to Savannah two days before Miles arrived so it was nice for us to have time together and nice to just not have to worry about taking the toddler to the bathroom, putting him down for naps, putting him in timeout when he got sassy, making meals, giving baths, laundry, cleaning, playing, etc.  Being a single parent for a few months with an infant and a toddler just got a little exhausting at times. I fully realize that it could be much worse - and Miles was only gone for a short time, but it still is just draining and I have crazy respect for the single parents who do it day in and day!

We decided it was best to just tell Finn that I was going to Georgia to look for a new house (since I was!) and leave out the part about Daddy coming home. I didn't want him to think that Mary got to go see Daddy, but he had to stay put - that would have been hard for him.

While the trip was a quick one, Mary and I were thrilled that we could be there when Miles returned:


After the weekend, I flew back home with Mary while Miles inprocessed back with his unit and waited until they were on block leave to return to Texas and help us move.

A little over a week ago Miles arrived back home. His flight got delayed (because of course) so instead of bringing Finn to the airport with me to pick Miles up, I put him to sleep at his cousins house where he would wake up the next day to his Daddy being home. When he did wake up the next morning (nearly two hours earlier than usual!) he was a bit confused as to what was going on. I took him to the bathroom and told him I had a surprise for him. I asked, "do you want your surprise?" to which he replied "uh huh" and I told him Daddy was home and we walked around the corner to see Miles waiting there for him. He just kind of stood there and stared at him for a minute trying to process it all. But within no time he was bringing Miles books and climbing all over him and has been his shadow ever since.


It's been so nice to see them together again and I'm so grateful that Finn has not had any issues readjusting to Miles being home in the sense that he hasn't had to warm up to him and they have been able to just pick back up where they left up. The one area we have seen some impact of Miles' absence has been with Finn's anxiety about him leaving again. Miles will walk out of the room and Finn will immediately ask me "wanna see Dadda, please?" or will just follow him anywhere he goes. When Miles was loading up the UHaul for our big trek to Savannah he closed the door behind him and Finn came in the room crying asking me where he went. He does not like it when Miles goes somewhere, even when he get out of the car to pump gas!

It's so sweet that he loves his daddy so much, but a little heartbreaking to know that he's worried about Miles leaving him again. Just something we will need to prep him for later this year when deployment #6 rolls around (sigh).

The other not-so-sweet side of it is that he wants nothing to do with me anymore! He wants Dadda to read the books and sit next to him. He wants Dadda to hold his hand and put him to bed at night. Don't worry kid, I only did everything for you for the last four months, I don't need a little love or anything you ungrateful jerk! 

All kidding aside, Finn has always been a Daddy's boy and I'm glad that despite a (short) deployment, he still totally is.


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7 comments:

  1. I'm so glad Dadda is home! Good luck settling into your new home. I don't have enough negative appropriate words to describe another deployment this year. 😖

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  2. What a wonderful thing to read, and these pictures are beyond heartwarming. Take advantage and grab some mommy time huh?

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  3. This made me tear up! So sweet and so sad about Finn worrying. Also I recognize that red shirt ;) haha

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  4. When Greg is home it is almost as if I don't exist sometimes. We don't even have any deployments or long trips to attribute it to either. But, when we are on the airplane and all she wants is Daddy then I don't mind so much. :)

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  5. That's so sweet and I agree about it being sad that Finn has shown anxiety about Miles leaving. What a little love. I just want to squeeze him.

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  6. So happy you are all together again and the reunion went well! And that you can catch a break now--I've learned that no matter how short the time as a "single" parent, the alone time can be just as stressful. Hope dada's boy can get some good quality time in during the next few months along with the rest of you <3

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  7. The pic with rosco and the babes... Too much.

    I <3 you guys. So happy he's home and you have Miles's with you in all thing child care. Sahm business kicks my ass some days. I literally watch the clock for nap time and dans home time!! You are an amazing force to be reckoned with!

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